Matt's blog

The story of me, an American in Edinburgh, Scotland finding my place as a musician, a husband, a father and a Christian.


Who are You?

Jeni and I have been watching a lot of CSI recently. Well, Jeni’s been watching more of it than I have, but in any event that song is now thoroughly stuck in my head. So who are you? Who am I? Well, I’m trying to tell you all who I am and figure it out for myself at the same time. When the internet first bubbled to the surface of pop culture, one of its big selling points was anonymity. Still is as a matter of fact. It seems like the ability to deny who we are is just getting more and more fashionable these days. With all the Patriot Act hubbub, people on both the far left and far right are crying out about our impending complete loss of privacy. My question is, what have you got to hide?

In the blogging world, there are a few takes on it. One is to hide nothing, and to whine and moan to no end for the whole world to read (and I’m sure they’re enthralled). The other end is to completely mask your identity. The type of identity masking I’m thinking of is not a false name, but a complete personal and emotional detachment from the thoughts you put on the web. I’m not trying to do either.

When I put something up here, it’s cause it’s important to me. Ok, every now and then you’ll get the four-liner posts about trading my wife in for a new car, but other than that I view blogging as a serious means of personal communication. So, why do I bring it up?

Jeni said to me earlier, “Weird, no one commented on your sexism post.” I thought it was weird, too, since I figured it would be a thought which would inspire some sort of reaction. I even decided to put up a counter to see if people are actually visiting the site. You and I both know the answer to that, of course people are. So why the silence?

A short digression. I think the internet is nearly a bust. Yup, pretty much a waste of time. This massive information sharing system has the capability to deliver meaningful knowledge and serve as a setting for deeply personal communication, but instead it pretty much just pumps idle small talk. Using the power of this technology I can formulate my thoughts, craft a well thought out letter which is probably more coherent than my ramblings on the same subject in person, and then put that letter up in a place where all my friends can read it instantly without the hassle of postage. On top of that, my friends can respond instantly and engage in conversation with me and with each other. So why don’t we?

You may notice in this that I’m echoing sentiments expressed by both Amy and Andrew.

I’m in a time of self-discovery right now. Unfortunately, up here in Spokane I’m pretty much isolated from the world I’m familiar with. I’d rather not be here. I’d rather be in L.A. with most of you who are reading this, but I can’t be. In lieu of that face to face connection, some connection here would be handy as I work stuff out. I’ll do my best to give that back to you as well.

I left the sexism part one post up for a few days longer than I was planning to see if it’d get any comments. It’s still there if you want to take a crack at it. Part 2 is coming soon.

3 Responses to “Who are You?”

  1. # Blogger Andrew Seely

    Wow I never thought I'd hear you say "I miss LA". Sweet.

    But as for the comment on the sexism post. I think I'm still digesting it and kinda not sure what to say. It is definately a lot to chew on and I would say that I mostly agree with it, but may need a bit more from you in terms of information/examples/theory on how to live it out/change/where do you want this to go/who do you want this to affect.

    So I'm sure some of that will be addressed in pt2.  

  2. # Blogger tim

    I didn't quite understand that last part of your argument about sexism but I think we agree. It's the same thing with racism. People say they aren't racist but they're all full of it. Of course they're racist. I'm a racist. When I see someone of a different race my initial reaction is to sterotype. I fight against it vigorously... but that racism is there. Same thing with sexism. I'm no cultural anthropologist, but my feeling is that the racism and sexism that exists in our culture needs to be understood and it needs to be fought. I think our culture is improving. On the whole we are a much less sexist and racist society than we were 100 years ago. But you cannot deny that it still exists. To do so would slow that cultural evolution. I think it's equally important to recognize your own inclinations to sexual and racial sterotyping (which you will apparently do in your next post). Bravo.  

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